God is so great that even I have have been given the ability to cook and serve dinner for 10 on those rare nights when mom is not around. However, she serves 11 everyday, and 20 something when we have company.

His wonders never cease.

Thank you for relating your experience, Danielle! It was very reassuring to this mom of 3 under 5. I do have days where I feel I just can't do it anymore, but somehow I keep going, only with God's help. As it is, I've lightened up about some things, although I'm not sure if it's b/c I've learned to choose my battles or b/c I'm just more tired or both! I find myself feeling guilty about being so hard on my oldest, though. Have you ever felt guilty about that?

Wonderful post and now sent to my wife!

Thanks for this post Danielle!! I don't think any of our children our mistakes but sometimes I marvel at my weaknesses and think God surely must have made a mistake in making me a mom of 3 littles and one on the way 5 and under. Then I realize of course God didn't make a mistake but I most cooperate with the graces to transform me to the disciple I am called to be. Of course this is easier said than done.

Who am I to disagree, Danielle, but I think you are a Super Mom. Just as my mom was, and many moms of large families are today. Because there's never been a time when a mom did everything herself. Many women with big families today still live in cultures where kin are involved and very close by, and where the pace is slower and lifestyle demands are different. Any woman who can have a large family in America today, and who does a great deal of the day-to-day alone while staying sane and even cheerful (and faithful), is a super mom in my books. (And could run most companies better than the CEOs we've got, no doubt!)

I also think you're selling yourself short. God's grace makes all the difference and to Him be the glory, but at the same time, you were willing. And you had the ability/capacity to respond. I know of some women who just weren't willing and just didn't (seemingly) have the abilities. So you might want to refuse any credit (and better for the humility that way!) but I for one think you could easily wear a Super Mom badge proudly.

Danielle - I had a moment like this recently when I shooed away my Mother In Law to allow my friend and I to serve our families: 8 little children, 6 adults. My long distance MIL didn't know that I am not "just" the young lady her son married 10 years ago, but a re-formed, capable mother of 4 in my own right. And I do this stuff all the time, and only rarely do I need to spend some time in the fetal postition afterwards! It amazes me how the Lord has increased my capacity to love, to handle chaos, to manage fear, to continue to open my heart to his little ones. Thank you for the post... And as you know, you may not be a Super Mom, but you are a Rock Star to me!

Thanks so much for this. It was just what I needed. I am expecting my 5th baby and I was having a hard day. I needed to be reminded of exactly what you said.
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!

I am almost at 7 years as a mom with 4 little ones and I do feel that 7 year itch. Your article was so eloquently put! Thank you for sharing your beautiful life with your adoring fans! :)

As great as my admiration is for Danielle, I prefer to believe her when she says she's no supermom. The thought that people like her are a breed apart is not helpful to me. The temptation to me is to say, "I'm not cut out for this," and be overcome by self-pity and despair and not even ask God's help to fulfill my responsibilities. Yet even for someone like me, God does supply the grace to do my job and do it well, if I just offer him even the smallest scrap of willingness to cooperate with his grace. So this article is very encouraging to me, not just in a compassionate way, but in a bracing way.

This is why I visit Faith and Family and Danielle Bean everyday. This attitude, this openess, this philosophy you have Danielle is completely grace filled! Thank you so very much for sharing the gift God has given you.

In many ways I am demographically different than those that frequent these spaces: I have one son in public school and work outside the home in the same school he attends teaching young children. You always make me feel welcomed, refreshed and included. I can't tell you how blessed I feel to have found this community. It's a community guided by your openness and understanding of what an authentic Catholic life truly means. God bless you!!

Thank you!

This article is very well timed.

Thank you, again, for your encouragement!

I appreciate your insights! I find myself feeling this way most days lately with 5, the oldest getting ready for kindergarten, one potty training, one teething, and the other two just causing general havoc! People are always asking me how I do it, and I am always thinking about all of the things going wrong and all the stuff not done at home. I could really use some grace. I know its there; its probably hiding under a pile of clothes.

One thing older, more experienced Moms have told me is that it gets easier as your oldest kids get older.

Because you may still have 3 under 5, but when you also have 3 more between 6 and 12, the older kids can help.

I'm noticing the change already.... having an almost 6,4,2 and being pregnant isn't any harder than having a 4,2, and being pregnant. My almost 6 can get snacks for herself and her sister and the older child seems to 'raise the level' of the whole house!

The other advice I've gotten, when I express regret that I can't do daily Mass, adoration, etc.... is "I didn't have those things when I was your age either. I had to wait for a different season of life"

I think, when you're surrounded by small fry, it's hard to remember that it's just a season, and that your life won't always be one crisis after another (usually involving bodily fluids!)

Thanks for a great article. I'm pregnant with #5 and my inlaws just recently visited. I run a tight ship around here but the best compliment from my MIL wasn't how well behaved my kids were but she thought it was great that we're raising the kids to help out around the house therefore they learn how to run a house. I, too, get the comments of having so many kids is hard work but, like you, I've noticed the graces that come with each child. God won't give you the grace to handle 5 children when you only have two. Not to mention, sometimes that grace is called "older children." They help a ton! Thanks again for a great article.

Thank you. Neither my husband nor I came from backgrounds where having many children close together was normal or sane, and so not only do I sometimes feel insane but I often feel woefully inadequate. My almost 4 year old daughter is just beginning to be helpful, my 2.5 year old son is a sweet hellion, and my 10 month old son is the best baby ever but starting to feel his oats-- and climb up the stairs! Thanks for reminding us to keep trying and not give up on our own development or God's grace.

Thank you...this post puts the whole "mommy" thing into perspective. None of us are capable on our own! God is Good and will help us if we just remember to ASK!
Also...time marches on...The little blessings of children who become good readers (thereby reducing the amount of one on one time needed for lessons) just when the little ones need you to teach them to read, big sisters who can get the little ones dressed while you make breakfast...all the joys of kids learning that it takes the whole family to hold it together. AH, LIFE! I wouldn't have it any other way.
Pax Christi!

As I sat reading your blog, I could totally relate. I am the proud and stressed mother of 2 girls, 15 months and 2 1/2 years. I am weeks away from the birth of my third child and feel overwhelmed a lot of the time. I trust that the Lord knows what He's doing by sending me these beautiful little people so close together.

Thanks for the encouragement, Danielle!

Danielle,

So true, so true!!!!!!! As the mother of 11 living children, grandmother of one and just having experienced a molar pregnancy last week and all of its ensuing difficulties, I live in the realm of God's grace. I like to tell people that when I had one child she required 100 percent of my time and energy. Then I go on to describe how two children encompassed all of my efforts and so on. It is not until we need the grace and sustenance of God that it is delivered to us. Scary????? Yes!!!!!!! But, Oh, how fulfilling that life of grace is.

Thanks, Danielle. Great article. Very reassuring to this young mom of 2 under 2 who hopes to have a large family one day!

Amen and amen! I too am a mom of eight and get a little tired of hearing people exclaim how wonderful I am. I Love your answer!

I am not. God IS!

Danielle,

This post is amazing. Thank you, thank you, thank you.